The Invisible Church Split - Part II

I previously introduced the idea that the church has a large division between the young and the old. Today I want to explore some of the issues this causes on both a small and large scale. Check out Part I for more background info!

 imagecred: richardwintle via AventuresInWonderland

Locally

This is extremely difficult to nail down simply because it begins so subtly. I have a hard time deciding what I think is healthy and what is unhealthy. However, when the young don't honor the old and the old don't teach the young, both groups suffer. 

Untaught young Christians grow into weak old Christians. This causes the local church to flounder in areas of Biblical literacy, evangelism and seeking righteousness. "Old Christians" (wherever the divide may fall in any particular body) who don't experience the process of bringing others along in their walk, begin to lack understanding for those in a less mature stage of their walk. This can lead to criticism of those with struggles inside the church (and possible denial of their own) as well as eventually causing an apathy for the unsaved.

I think this also circles back around. When the elders in the church don't have compassion for the lost in sin, young people begin to polarize. You either have to be a "church person" and separate themselves from the world completely or choose to be in it. I see so many teens and young adults fall into sinful lifestyles partly because they've been told they can't be around "those kinds of people" or "those kinds of activities". They feel shame around Christians because they've been told they're guilty of sin if they break their fathers extra-Biblical commandments. 

Regionallly

Regional areas and countries fall into their own bad habits. Though we most likely all struggle with very similar things, certain cultural aspects have an effect on a divided church. One of the major ones in the US is the death of old congregations and the emergence of churches heavily weighted in numbers of young people. Many of these churches are planted and then dwindle withing a few years because of the lack of elderly wisdom. Because of the importance of social classes, in the UK there are large churches in prominent areas struggling with being superficial and lukewarm. No one wants to man up and cross lines that would make them uncomfortable. 

Globally

Internationally, I think there is actually some benefit to this sad problem. While worldwide evangelism and disciple-making see their fair share of neglect, they also get the unhealthy church's "rejects".

For example, my pastor's wife was telling me a tragic story of a missionary she knows losing his wife. As she described him she noted that he's someone people describe as "over the top" (for instance taking his wife and children to spread the gospel in the islamic middle east) but that she felt like he embodied what Jesus described for all believers to look like. 

Similarly, we had a leader who tried to explain to us that since we were so bent on making disciples, we might want to go overseas. He wasn't sure we really fit around here.

While churches all over sit in their abundance and barely acknowledge people and places who need their prayers, efforts and resources, at least they send them the best disciple makers they have (unfortunately, to it's own detriment).

What kind of issues to you find affecting your local/regional church? What other consequences do you see that I didn't hit here?

Comment/Email your answer!

The Invisible Church Split - Part I

There is crack, a crevice almost, through many local church bodies. It splits a single congregation into two, without even the cost of a new building. While not terribly financially wasteful in most cases, it is a fissure that is always very costly.

 imagecred: richardwintle via AventuresInWonderland

The division of which I speak of is in age: the old from the young/the young from the old. We're going to take this slow and really unpack the issue. My goal is to deal with how I personally see it manifested globally and locally. (I would love to hear your personal observations as well!) I'd then like to look at the consequences on the mission of the gospel both worldwide and regionally. And thirdly, we'll go over some things each of us can do to make a difference where we are. (Hopefully I can keep myself from proposing giant generalizations that are unrealistic such as "if we'd all just...work at it!") 

What Division

I recently discussed this issue with a Spiritual leader of mine. When I hinted at the line down the middle of the room in one particular situation she looked at me with such a cluelessness that I laughed! She hadn't noticed it until I pointed it out, partly because she isn't part of the problem so she couldn't imagine young and old Christians treating each other as if they're aliens to be held at a safe distance!

In The Local Church

I'm sure there are many ways in which it appears in individual bodies, but here are things that I've observed in my own and other congregations. This is one issue on which I'd LOVE to receive e-mails/comments from you describing what you see.

• Lack of discipleship among believers of different generations: I know you've heard from me before on this issue, but it's the first one that comes to mind. If we weren't so afraid of each other (of judgement and approval, of vulnerability, of what we might have to say to each other...) or making our minds up without giving the other a chance, we could all learn a ton!(Titus 2:1-8)
• Lack of fellowship (inter-generational relationships): Plain and simple: we're not friends. This is not a rule, but for the most part I don't see a lot of 40+ or 50+ couples chillin' with the newlyweds, college age and high school students. Within the church, we are all equal in this: we we're outside, condemned to eternal seperation from our Creator and we have all been brought near through the Redeeming blood of Christ. Something about "those young'ns" and "those old fogies" makes us act as if we are different kinds of Christians. (Prov 27:9, Rom 3:21-25)
• Literal church splits and/or migrations: This is not an ingenious epiphany. Many have noted the increase in young people planting their own churches and leaving the grey-haired behind in a congregation with no long-term future. Young people reject the wisdom of those who've been around the block and so many experienced believers stand on non-Biblical convictions and "the way things are". Eventually someone says, "Fine, we'll just go do it our way."(Prov 16:31; 20:29)
• The physical line: Show up to your local worship service, maybe even Bible study or small group and the chances are you find this. It may appear as a line down the middle of the room, certain areas or rows that have an unspoken weekly reservation or maybe just large generationally discriminant pockets/groups. I have to be very open and honest with this one. This doesn't happen quite so much in our worship services, although everyone has "their spot" and in a rural community I think they pretty much get passed down in the will! However, I do attend a multi-generational Bible study where there has been some finger-pointing at "you young people" based on purely extra-Biblical convictions. One time I happened to sit next to another young mother who sensed my frustration simply because my body stiffened at the conversation going on around us. I (working on being slow to speak) knew I couldn't address the issue right then without overreacting in passion. She jumped in and said exactly what I wished I could have without blowing a fuse. I really appreciated her support and so I naturally migrated to the seat next to her around the table weekly. Slowly, everyone under 40 migrated to that side of the circle leaving everyone else to their own side. It was never intentional but I knew exactly what had happened.
• Failing programs: Without the wisdom of plenty of mature Christians of all ages AND the attendance of Christians (and unsaved in some cases) who have plenty to learn, also of all ages: well intended programs, classes and services die. You probably already know how I feel about cookie-cutter programs, but when people serve in the manner their community needs, people come to know the Lord and grow to be more like Him. This requires breaking generational gaps to be completely effective. Otherwise, we are severely limiting the amount of discipleship that could be happening.

These are just a few of the things that came to my mind as I write. Like I said, I'm sure there are more (maybe even obvious ones that I'm missing like my dear friends missed our physical line in Bible study).

Very soon we'll discuss the effects and some possible solutions. In the mean time, I look forward to hearing from you on what you see!

Do you notice any age separation in the church? If so, please share!

The Shepherd and the Sheep; Who's Failing Who?

Have you ever moved? As an adult, has your career or other circumstance ever required you to pack up and start over somewhere else? My husband and I bought another house (in the same city as our old house) last year. Being a military brat, it was my first household move without a (paid-for) truck full of guys who come and stuff your junk into boxes, load it on a truck and reverse the process at the other end. I look back and chuckle, but it was mildly traumatic for me when my well-meaning father-in-law unexpectedly backed his truck up to my house and announced that he and his employees were there to help.

Well, here we ago again.

My husband and I are in the middle of an interesting transition (which you can read about here) to another church. I have to mention that this isn't just any church, it's the church I grew up in (or the closest thing to it for a moving military kid). One of the many (many, many) things on my mind through this whole process is the "career" of pastor. I've written about the responsibilities of the pastor before, but the way the job plays out in the life of todays clergymen (and women) and in our culture gives rise to concerns in my insides.

Several years ago, when my husband was offered the job as youth pastor at our current church, one of his mentors told him (who knows where he got this stat) that the average youth pastor stays at a church for only three years. That's not even long enough to see the freshmen graduate much less mentor junior high students successfully into adulthood. Nic and I have always been appalled by the frequent church-hopping that happens in our city, but pastors only staying for three years?

Nic and I have always considered ourselves "lifers" - we assume that we will be at the church God has brought us to for life unless God very clearly tells us otherwise. Attendance in any given body of believers should be considered carefully and faithfully. If conflict arises, resolve it. If sin arises, deal with it in grace and repentance. If you're "not happy with" some of the goings on, you remind yourself that church isn't about you and do what you think you need to to ensure that Jesus' body is honoring Him. I don't say this from a position of a perfect track-record, but I do say it from experience.

While the average Western Christian's view on commitment to a particular church is saddening, the cultural effect on the Western Pastor is even more disheartening. With the development of denominational networks and church job websites, a seminary graduate can climb the ladder in no time. Wait. What?

Therein lies our problem. Let's play a little fill in the blanks game here... Most young people graduate from Bible School and make their ___ (5, 10, 20) year career plan. [problem #1: needing a plan. As Francis Chan puts it, God didn't give Abraham a 5 year, much less a 20 year plan when he told him to pack up and move to a new land and that he'd become the father of nations.] Said student might think to themselves, I'll put applications in to be a/an ________ (children's, worship, youth, associate, small groups, interim, other?) pastor at a _________ (smaller, rural, less known, average, springboard) type church. [problems #2 & #3: The position and body one serves in cannot be seen as mere stepping stones on the path to career success] After I get some experience under my belt, I'll start looking at ______ (bigger, cooler, more trendy, more relevant, more Biblical, well-known, higher-paying) churches or a/an ______ (preaching pastor, head pastor, evangelist, traveling speaker) job that I really want. [problem #4: a pastor seriously wrongs their sheep when he even subconsciously considers them a bullet point on his resumé.]

First of all, pastoring is a calling. And no body of believers is a mere springboard for one person's career success. If a pastor doesn't think he is called to minister to young people, why would he think he has the right to take a job doing just that "in the meantime"? Doing a job God didn't design you for seems like a really quick way to get burnt out fast to me! Similarly, I find it interesting that exponentially more pastors are apparently "called" to wealthier and urban churches. If we measure by the number of clergy and their calling, it would appear that God cares very little about the communities and churches in less-hip or poorer areas. Thankfully, the Bible shows us that God's heart is for the marginalized. In fact, most of Jesus' ministry on this earth was focused on the blue-collar, poor and marginalized. It looks to me as if we need to reevaluate the term calling.

Secondly, I think we have shorted both pastors and congregations in the way we have defined their roles. Burn out often happens when a pastor doesn't pastor his family. This is his first ministry. Every pastor's wife and child knows their are time when we have to wait. But ensuring that he has time to spiritually attend to his family is the duty of the pastor. So where does the congregation fit it? Expectations. A church should expect their pastor to take time for his family in order for him to qualify to be their minister (see 1 Tim 2). Their expectations of him should be his best in home and ministry and the give-and-take (aka hard work and grace) that this entails. Also, the congregation should be expected to do their part. A great many pastors and youth pastors tucker out because they run like mad trying to fulfill all of the duties of the church. Instead, each believer should serve and grow in the unique gifts that God has given them. When we all pitch in, a pastor can help us grow (his job as shepherd) and ensure that we (the church as a whole) function to glorify God and further His Kingdom. (Eph 4 & 5, Rom 12, 1 Cor 12)

So now I ask you...how do you view commitment to a church? Why do you think Pastors move to new jobs (in or out of ministry) so quickly?

The church is a whore, but she is my mother.

I should start out by explainging that the title is a quote from St Augustine. Now that you're not completely ready to eat me alive, I'll get to my own narrative.

All of you who either follow my blog or read it through Facebook (or encounter me on the street for that matter) will have some idea of my frustrations with the church. This is not specifically with the congregation in which I worship corporately, but with the global Christian church. Without specifically going into my "beefs" with the Body (of which I am a part, just know that I don't think we are honoring God with our functions, resources, worship or envageliistic efforts by doing them in manner He has asked us to. I also believe that this is all very much our own doing. This statement also warrants more explanation than I intend to give right now, but maybe I can give it another post on a another day.

In all my passion and offense at the adultery and no forth of the church, I've wavered back forth on one very tough issue: where do I direct my frustrations. This is not merely an issue of who to talk to; I often wonder who to be mad at. An older (than us) youth pastor told me to be mad at the enemy. As I pondered this, I felt like it was giving Satan and demons to much credit and not holding Christians accountable for their actions and attitudes. But after reading one author's expounding on the title quote, the Spirit led me to understand why I should direct my frustration at the enemy.

To paraphrase Augustine, while the church has been a whore, she is still my mother. I can't leave her any more than I could my own mother. - Adam McLane from his article Open-Source Theology for Immerse Journal

If you were to spend any amount of time ministering to prostitutes, sex slaves or rape victims (or the many who have been all three) you would soon find yourself quite angry at the men responsible for making those women (and men) believe lies that led them to, forced them into or kept them in their appalling situation. You would see that, while their situation is horrid, the prostitute or victim has the kind of soul that Jesus died to save. Your disgust for the evil and deception that got her(him) there would ingite a compassion and passion to remove them from the burdens of their situation.

Likewise, who should we get angry at when we see the Body (and individual members of it) hurting itself? The father of lies. In a losing battle with the everlasting Father, Satan's best offensive is to seduce His Bride and mislead His children.

While I know all to well how difficult it is to keep this big picture in mind when confronted with the frequent "missing the mark" of the local church and conflicts with individual members of the Body, it is all very important to remember. Even when we witness the body injuring itself, we are to act as we would to the promisicuous sex-slave as we fight to free her. Our passion for the the church should never pit us against her. It should always spur us to humble obedience of the simple (and yet obviously very difficult) demands for the church in the Word. I would like to reiterate that we must (pick up our crosses and) follow Jesus, not the ideas of what the church should look like that men have conjured.

I repent of unhealthy attitudes I have portrayed before you all and my Saviour. It's hard for me to know any other way than to tell everyone to stop everything they're doing and start over (something I've had to do myself over and over btw). I'll finish with this, Bonhoeffer's words from his biography by Eric Mataxas:

Here I meet people as they are, far from the masquerade of "the Christian world", people with passions, criminal types, small people with small aims, small wages and small sins—all in all they are people who feel homeless in both senses, and who begin to thaw when one speaks to them with kindness—real people; I can only say that I have gained the impression that it is just these people who are much more under grace than under wrath, and that it is the Christian world that is more under wrath than grace.